Derailed Road Trip Conversation

10:53pmJack
wow
you already promised you would go

10:54pmMike
no I didn't
my mom probably wouldn't let me

10:54pmJack
remember?

10:54pmMike
I don't make promises
I BREAK THEM

10:54pmJack
you said "I will definitely go on this trip no matter what"
your mother loves me
she would totally let you go

10:58pmMike
she has never met you
probably thinks you are a trouble maker
who would rob the shoes off of my feet if given the chance

10:59pmJack
I think I may have actually met her once when she was helping you move stuff in?
regardless she knows OF me

10:59pmMike
maybe
how do you know I ever say anything about you
I could suppress info

11:00pmJack
my parents ask me questions about you sometimes

11:00pmMike
like if I roll drugs

11:00pmJack
they'll be like "so do you still see Mike Petrie a lot?"

11:00pmMike
get arrested

11:00pmJack
boring stuff like that
and I'll be like
yeah we snort crack every weekend together
and they'll be like "i knew he was a troublemaker"

11:01pmMike
pile as high as the ceiling

11:04pmMike
I told my parents that you don't speak english
and that you are a columbian drug lord
selling to students

11:04pmJack
soy un mercandero de drogas

11:05pmMike
then they don't ask about you

11:06pmJack
i bet your parents love me. Everyone's parents love me.
I seem so innocent
little do they know

11:07pmMike
that's what my one friend also said

11:08pmJack
well were he/she right?

11:08pmMike
until they slipped up
they're six feet under now
in another country

11:17pmJack
nick kaplan probably wouldn't want you to call him dead

11:18pmMike
where you creeping through my facebook feeds
to see which of my friends went to another country

11:18pmJack
no, i knew that prior

11:18pmMike
when

11:18pmJack
i dunno like a month ago
people you frequently interact with on facebook show up in your feed a lot
you show up in my feed a lot

11:19pmMike
YOU WERE CREEPIN
IN MY PAGES

11:20pmJack
that's patently ridiculous